The Life of an Ambivert

 Turns out I have n-covid-19 finally. So does my mother and father. My sister is negative. I have been confined to one room for the past 22 hours now and it hurts already. I have decided to formally take up yoga, in an effort to do something interesting with my time. I also started to binge watch Naruto. I don't think I can make my flight back to Malaysia. I promised a friend that I would take her to a cat cafe for her birthday, so that's not happening as well. At least not until the end of my quarantine period. I don't want to disappoint her. Oh right, I also have my academics to think of. 

 I think I'm going to give meditation a try. Just did a de-stressing course, have to say its the most relaxed I've felt these past six months. Who would have thought breathing would be the answer? 

 According to a Psychology professor, writing a gratitude journal will help me become more optimistic and positive. Something about positive reinforcement that could increase my serotonin and dopamine. Hah! Nothing can pull me out of this pool of cortisol and absolute misery. 

A good summary of the pandemic could be presented like the activity on this blog. A furtive attempt at normalcy by not addressing the 6 month gap that took place in between my posts. I don't even know what to put into this blog anymore. It's not even funny anymore to laugh at my own depression. Why wasn't this year as productive as I made it out to be? So many dreams, so few turned to reality. My house feels like a fancy prison. I only go out when I have to walk my dog or water the plants or do the laundry. I don't procrastinate on any of my house chores anymore, which should be a good thing but it feels wrong. I enjoy doing them, they break this seemingly everlasting monotony. I wanted to learn mandarin, instead I spent two weeks training my non-creative mind making haiku poems.  My shame is slowly degrading day by day. I actually began an academic essay for my module with a haiku on the pandemic.  Half-year of caution wrought, Ideas run dry, Nature finds fleeting pe...